Tuesday, May 24, 2011

What Are Your Food Addictions?

Yesterday after work my husband called and asked me to meet him at our local grocery store.

Um, whatever.

Keep your sexy date night at the club people.

The Man I Married and I like to get it on in aisle five right next to the peanuts and Doritos.

Except for one thing...

The two of us foraging around a grocery store on a payday weekend is akin to setting a pack of wild dingoes loose in a barnyard full of chickens.

In other words, not your best idea.

Although I managed to pick up a few healthy items; the t-bone steak, Kettle Crunch potato chips and Tiramisu cheesecake that somehow made their way into my cart taunted me the entire way home.

I am an all or nothing kind of gal.

If I'm eating in a healthy manner, it's easy for me to keep it up providing I don't stray from the chosen path.

'Give me your lentils, your Wasa Crisp, and the mighty chick pea and, verily, I shall eat.'

But set my foot off the path of high fibre, and my mind begins to wander.

Especially after that first slice of cheesecake.

Or in my case; tiramisu.

But I'm proud to report that I succesfully hid the two bags of Kettle Crunch chips in order to protect my husband's cholesterol.

What a wife!

Then I enjoyed a grilled t-bone with a lovely side salad, a glass of red wine and even allowed myself a small piece of tiramisu because "everything in moderation" seems the sensible way to live.



I put on my flannel pyjamas and furry socks, made a pot of peppermint green tea, lit some candles, and settled into the couch for a round of tv watching, relaxation, and self care where I caught the end of Throw Down with Bobby Flay.

Then I put on a DVD called Angel Falls starring Heather Locklear.

The candles were twinkling, my movie was playing, and the fragrance of peppermint and lavendar swirled up from the tea cup and candles by my side.

The moment was pure Zen.

In fact, the only thing missing was a voice over singing 'Celebrate the moments of your life...'

And all I could think about as I watched Heather Locklear frolic about on screen - besides the fact that she really shouldn't have had her lips done - was:

I wanted the damn chips.

And the longer I sat and obsessed about them, the worse the craving became.

So I rationalized.

What harm could one small bowl of chips do?


I crept ever so quietly to the cabinet - careful not to make any sudden noises that might alert the family as to my whereabouts - and set the super sized bag of balsamic vineagar and sea salt chips free.

Then I read the nutritional info on the back.

Twelve chips had 172 calories and 9 g of fat.

Chump change people.

I could afford to eat twelve chips, get over my craving, and return to the movie.

So that's what I did.

Carefully counted out 12 chips, and then folded the bag and placed it quietly back into the China cabinet.

*Cue the dramatic silence followed by two claps of thunder*

The next thing I know, I'm like an alcoholic who's been given a sip of scotch on Christmas eve.

And by the end of the evening, I was hiding empty bags.


Do you ever wonder why all the good stuff is so easy to give up?

If you told me tomorrow I could never eat another carrot, indulge in a serving of low fat cottage cheese, grapefuit, or celery, in the immoratal words of Miss Gloria Gaynor - I would survive.

But take away my chips, sugar, butter, or T Bone steaks and I would be a mess.

Why do you think that is?

In men, love, and food - why are the things that are the worst for us always the hardest to give up?

And what are your food addictions?

Enquiring minds want to know!


  1. I have to be careful with tortilla chips and other deep fried foods.

    I have yte to read it but I hear that the book, 'the end of overeating' goes into the reasosn behind this in detail.

  2. Pretty much anything with brown gravy. Also any pasta I make.

    My food obsession, though, has to be corned beef. I want to make it every day.